Gabby Petito’s father speaks out about ‘missing White woman syndrome’

I give full credit to anyone trying to bring more attention and resources to any missing people. But this constant assumption that the reason some people get attention while others don't is all about race really bothers me. Haven't people ever heard that "correlation doesn't mean causation?"

First of all, only a TINY percentage of crimes end up going viral and getting a ton of attention. The vast majority of white missing people will be completely ignored. If everything were perfectly equal, 75% of the US population is white, so it would be expected that 75% of the people who would go viral would be white. Hispanic is 20%, but for some very odd reason some police departments combine the white and hispanic numbers. 13% of the US population is black, and 1.3% are Native American and 6.4% are Asian. I get that those percentages are both rounded and also very vague categories, but that's what a quick Google search gave me. Now we know that the stats don't perfectly mirror those numbers, but anyone who is expecting 50% of viral cases to be missing black victims are really expecting something bizarre. If say 3 cases go viral in a given year, statistically it would be most likely that 2 of them would be white, and the third would likely be hispanic or white – but depending on the stats you are looking at it wouldn't matter because hispanic and white are considered the same.

Second, as a side note there is a MUCH bigger discrepancy staring us in the face than racial disparity. The two biggest disparities are age and sex. Adult men, especially senior citizens, are almost always ignored if they go missing. If we really believe that numbers prove discrimination, why aren't we harping on and on about the discrimination against men?

Are there predictable factors that make a missing person's case more likely to go viral? Absolutely. To begin with, someone who cares needs to notice that they have even gone missing in the first place. If children born in the house never go to school and are locked up in the basement, the school system doesn't know they exist and hospitals may not know, and neighbors may not know. If they are ultimately found it will be a huge story, but until then the story goes under the radar. Or if a single man in his 30's signs up to join the Peace Corp and goes missing on his way to the airport, his family may assume he is out of the country without access to communication, and the people assigned to work with him may think he just decided to back out at the last moment in a very unprofessional way. If a child born outside the country is smuggled into the country as part of a human trafficking ring and goes missing, those who don't know about human trafficking may never even know the person is here, and those in human trafficking may not care and may not dare to ask questions or file a report. It doesn't mean that person doesn't matter. And if their case ever comes to light it might be a really big case. But unless someone knows you are missing your case literally can't go viral.

Next, our brains are wired to look for threats, so most of us tend to be drawn into stories that change our model of what is dangerous in the world. If a woman hooked on meth who works as a prostitute goes missing we may feel sorry for her, but we all know that buying and consuming illegal drugs is a very dangerous activity, and so is prostitution, so learning she went missing doesn't change our model of the world and what is dangerous in the world. This is why, for example, the case of Elizabeth Smart gained so much traction. Most of us feel safe if we are in a home in a decent neighborhood with the door locked. The idea that someone could come in through the window and take us out of our bed in a brand new threat, and the very active part of our brains that is designed to track threats is going to pay attention.

In addition, our brains thrive on novelty. Does a case have an extremely unusual aspect about it? A missing person's case about a drug dealer who has gone missing isn't new or surprising. But a case like D.B. Cooper where the person basically disappeared off an airplane with lots of money is different enough to draw attention.

The next factor is going to be pacing. The same night the Idaho 4 were killed, there was a shooting at the University of Virginia. That night, most of the attention was on the shooting at the University of Virginia because there were many more details of that crime coming out every few minutes. However, by the end of that night the University of Virginia shooting story had pretty much run its course because we knew who had done it. In contrast, the University of Idaho killings were keeping everyone guessing, which kept the story alive. Gabby Petito's case was perfect for pacing. On the one hand, it wasn't moving so fast that people had answers to questions almost before they could pose the question. On the other hand, the story was constantly moving forward. First, Gabby was missing with Brian. Then Brian showed up at home. Then his parents were completely uncooperative. Then Brian had disappeared. Then Gabby and Brian were both found. Then we had letters and journal entries. And not all of the evidence was released immediately, so we had the drama of anticipation before major releases of big pieces of evidence. The Gabby Petito case is honesty one of the best paced cases there has ever been with plenty of payoffs in terms of surprise twists.

Obviously, we also care about protecting the weakest and most innocent among us. This explains a lot of the sex and age impacts of which stories go viral. As a species, we are hard-wired to protect our most vulnerable – which is usually our children, which is why we are biologically wired to protect them. This includes children especially, but also young, naive women.

In addition, if there is a clear villain for everyone to suspect, our sense of justice and fairness kicks in, and it can start to feel like an obsession if we are powerless to enforce that sense of justice. Sometimes, the villains are actually guilty. And sometimes they are completely innocent. But their presence is all that matters from a psychology perspective of what goes viral. For example, Casey Anthony is a fun villain for a lot of people to hate. Or if the villain involves some kind of potential government conspiracy/coverup/incompetency, even better.

We can say it's because since 75% of viewers want to see themselves in the victim that's why white victims get more traction, but honesty it likely is a very small factor – if any factor at all. Most of our reactions are hardwired into our brains, and sometimes that's for a good reason. For example, our brains hyperfocus on new threats because hyper-focusing on new threats keeps us alive.

Timing is also crucial. For example, consider the JonBenet case. I actually believe John Ramsey is right that part of why their case went viral before viral was really a thing was because the OJ Simpson trial had just ended, and there was an open hole in the 24 hour news cycle that needed to be filled, and JonBenet came along at just the right time to fill it.

I strongly suspect if we went over every case that didn't go viral it is missing at least one of these elements. Is race sometimes correlated with this? Yes. However, it isn't exclusively white victims who go viral. For example, consider Elisa Lam. And just because race is correlated, it doesn't mean it caused it. For example, I strongly suspect middle class families and upper class families are more likely to have a crime committed in what is supposed to be a safe environment. But that's an income thing, not a race thing. Who cares? Well, it matters. To fix the problem, we need to fix income inequality, not send everyone to racial sensitivity trainings, for example.

To be clear, these aren't the factors that SHOULD matter. Every single missing person is equally important. But because of practical reasons and how our brains are wired, they are unfortunately the way things DO happen. And I support anyone who takes a tragedy in their life to prevent or draw attention to other tragedies that are being ignored. It doesn't matter why they are being ignored. It only matters THAT they are being ignored and that they are no longer being ignored as people bring attention to them.

Thank you, Joseph Petito for this '𝘉𝘦𝘢𝘶𝘵𝘪𝘧𝘶𝘭 𝘛𝘳𝘪𝘣𝘶𝘵𝘦' to your daughter, Gabby, and to the Humanity of all Missing Persons!

Never trust mayos

February25, 2025- I JUST searched for missing women of color and all I could find was people bitching about the disparities of races and the missing people who get reported on— there was like ONE VIDEO about ACTUAL MISSING WOMEN OF COLOR. Apparently media didn’t learn their lesson. 🙄

Cope harder that white parents look for their missing children whereas black fathers run away from their children.

That is amazing, you can tell this man thinks with his heart. He's not wrong either, what do the unapologetically racist assume when minorities are killed or go missing? Probably turned to drugs, joined a gang, became a hooker, or ran off with a drug dealer boyfriend.

Sorry but she is one of many
. But ya cuz shes white it is a headline

God bless this man and may his daughter RIP.

Way to go!

The "white woman syndrome" is indeed a real thing. I live in Cameroon, West Africa and the media sensation around Gabby Petito's case reached us here in Africa. Her name was all over the Western news channels I followed and I wondered who she was. I also follow 60 Minutes and 48 Hours crime shows and 99% of their stories are often about white people , to the point where if I didn't know better, I'd have thought only white people get murdered. Glad Gabby's dad is standing up for this. Peace everyone.

He must have been offered a lot of money to say that garbage! There is no “missing white woman syndrome “! Just more of this post Obama anti whiteism

I’m a black man. I’m amazed that some black TV anchors and national shows’ hosts don’t report about any missing blacks, but whine when there is an attention about a missing person who happens to be white!! ………Gabby’s case went viral because many young of all races related to her.

Another white Liberal, boring.

CNN cant go a day without villainizing white people for just existing

This is off subject but if your family releases ballons at birthday parties and such youre from a low I.Q. family

The FBI still hasn’t gotten involved in the missing pregnant mail lady from Chicago

Humans are trash, women especially. She didn't know to to control her mouth and she got killed. Cause -> effect. Dumb woman.

Respect to this man.

She wasn’t missing someone knew where she was

I hate that a horrible crime had to happen for this to be acknowledged and im truly sorry for his loss. Im happy of how he choose to heal and deal with his pain though✨️

Mad respect for Gabby's dad! We need more people doing selfless acts!!! Her legacy shines brightly through her family's awareness for others less fortunate.

Proud of him. Thank you so much. 💙

Well this was dumb

People are gonna call him Woke for doing this, but it’s good he is helping other families of missing people

As a African American man I can admit that this story actually made me cry. The fact that this man and his family have managed to turn there pain into something this beautiful is utterly remarkable. God bless this family and I hope they are able to bring some real attention to this issue.